18 Apr 2008

" It's time to relax, now you've worked your arse off
But the only one smilin' is the sun tanned boss

Work and work and work and work till you die
There's plenty more fish in the sea to fry"
I'm now at that stage in my life where I see kid's fashion and think "That just looks shit." The ones that really make me laugh are the 'emo' kids, whatever the hell an 'emo' is I dunno and more to the point I don't care, but I digress. They have all the dress sense of a Japanese housewife crossed with a manga character and a slightly gay goth in a sort of bizarre Jeff Goldblum in 'The Fly' transporter accident. Some of them are truly bizarre, like they were halfway through a haircut suddenly remembered a life or death appointment and crashed the car into a jumble sale on the way home. Other people that piss me off are the ones that have the waistband of their trousers under the bumcakes. Get a fucking belt people. I don't want to see a crack of some blokes arse when I turn a corner in my shop just because you want to see something on the bottom shelf, we have somewhere to park our bikes. I keep wanting to go up to them and hoist their trousers up and say in a stern manner "You dress properly young man or I shall have words with your mother" Whilst wagging my finger at them. There was a girl the other day looking at the batteries with about six inches of bum crack showing, I nearly played 'arse cake darts' with my pen but thought better of it. And to think that 100 years ago you were considered a slut if you showed too much ankle. I used to despise the 'chavs' around the area, what with their pastel coloured baseball caps perched on the back of their heads, with the hem of the tracksuit tucked into the white sports socks but now I just laugh at them with their ugly dogs, also the animals they hang around with. Mind you I suppose some thought has gone into the outfit as it's ideal for the purpose it was designed for, running away from the police/shop security. I get to carry the security radio around with me all day at work (joy) and it can get quite exciting at times, just like some radio drama. If it's not chavs it's big issue sellers being watched and followed all day. Bournemouth for some unknown reason seems to be inundated with Big Issue vendors at the moment. None of them have seen soap for a while, which beggars the question why try to convince me that you are trying to decide whether to purchase the portable dvd player for £100 or not? Personally I follow them around like a cleaner version of their own shadow until they take the hint and fuck off. I mean if you have £100 to spare, (which I doubt), Then try walking down the hill to superdrug spend £20 on soap and such and use the other £80 on maybe the first step in sorting your life out? Just a thought (a surprisingly right wing thought... for me anyway). Instead you waste my time in making me follow you around so that I can't serve other customers you know the ones that had a bath this side of oooh let's be generous and say Christmas. I'm certain that if they had been around Hitler would have added Big Issue sellers to his 'Shit list'....Hmmmm there is an empty shop across the road from us. I wonder if the Prince Of Wales Trust would give me a grant in setting up a gas chamber? Maybe not but I'm pretty certain the Duke of Edinburgh would fork out from his own pocket.

Anyway enough middle aged (sigh) rantings here's the music. Firstly I've upped a shedload of my latest vinyl rips (list in comments) and I've posted a couple of great albums firstly Legalize It by Peter Tosh and David Bowie's Heroes.

Vinyl
Vinyl
Tosh
Heroes

P.S. So
rry for the lengthy delay.... I now have a PS3. With you've guessed it Star Wars Lego on it....well it does have extra levels and characters... and a PSP with Medal Of Honor Heroes 2 on it so I'm pretty muched fuck as far as social contact goes.

15 comments:

Mike said...

Amazulu - Excitable (Extended 12 inch remix)
Bad Manners - Samson And Delilah (Biblical Version)
Blondie - Sunday Girl (French Version)
Double Trouble & The Rebel MC - Just Keep Rockin (Skouse Mix)
Duran Duran - My Own Way (Night Version)
Frankie Goes To Hollywood - Two Tribes (Carnage)
Furniture - Brilliant Mind
Happy Mondays - Hallelujah (The MacColl Mix)
Ian Dury & The Blockheads - Reasons To Be Cheerful pt3
Landscape - Eintstein A Go Go
Pat Benatar - Love Is A Battlefield (Special Extended Re-Mix)
Rebel MC & Double Trouble - Street Tuff (Scar Mix)
Simply Red - Money's Too Tight To Mention (The Cutback Mix)
Soul To Soul - Back To Life (However Do You Want Me) (One World Remix)
St. Etienne - Only Love Can Break Your Heart
That Petrol Emotion - Abandon (Boy's Own Mix)
The Cure - Love Cats (Extended)
The Damned - Grimly Fiendish (Spic 'n' Span Mix)
The Inspiral Carpets - This Is How It Feels (Extended)
The KLF - 3 A.M Eternal (Live At The S.S.L)
The Mighty Wah! - Come Back (The Story Of The Reds-The Devil In Miss Jones) (Combined And Extended)
The Wedding Present - No Christmas
The Wedding Present - Step Into Christmas
UB40 - Folitician
UB40 - I Won't Close My Eyes

Neil said...

An emo is a goth, whose parents won't let him/her be a goth - at least that what we tell our emo - she loves it (especially when we tell it to her emo friends hanging outside the library in Norwich on a saturday afternoon)

Anonymous said...

arse cake darts-too much ankle discourse - funny. Rock on, my friend!

Anonymous said...

I love the EMO bit - is it because they all look as weird as Emo Philips (strangely weird American comedian of sorts) ????????

HJ said...

I just stumbled across this blog looking for 2 tone info/stuff, much thanks for all the Ska. Any chance of getting some of the older stuff reposted?

Mike said...

I shall certainly do that as soon as I've got this bloody wireless router working :-(((

HJ said...

need any help? I am an IT nerd for my day job...

Mike said...

Thanks but my bearded toothless hag of a landlord managed to get it all set up whilst I was at work. New post imminent

Anonymous said...

Hey Man. Hope you're well. Missing your tales!

Anonymous said...

Hey Mike,
Recently I've discovered your blog and I definitely love it! Hope you'll get your router fixed.
Best wishes from Holland.

Mike said...

Thanks and my router seems to be behavibg since we got the phoneline fixed (if it's not one thing it's another) ;)

HJ said...

any chance I can request an re-up from Sept 2007? I was looking for the Stiff rarities, but rapidshare has killed the link.

Thanks much!

Mike said...

OK, I'll put them up as soon as I've finished writing the next one (and shooting Nazis) :)

HJ said...

cool, thanks. Have fun and get those nazi bastards :)

Anonymous said...

einstein - he was a 'good old boy' ;)